The Law

1. The law of volunteering: If you dance with a grizzly bear, you better let him lead.

2. The law of avoiding oversell: When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.

3. The know-its-time-to-quit law: The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets

4. The law of common sense: Never accept a drink from a urologist

5. The first law of reality: There are days when no matter which way you spit, it is upwind

6. The second law of reality: When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.

7. The third law of reality: Whatever it is that hits the fan, it will not be distributed equally.

8. The fourth law of reality: Never get into fights with ugly people. They have nothing to lose.

9. The fifth law of reality: Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.

10. The law of goal-setting: Reality is a crutch for those who cannot cope with fantasy.

11. The law of escape: When you are in a hole, stop digging.

12. The law of vision: The higher you climb, the further you can see, but the view gets fuzzier.

13. The sixth law of reality: You'll never win a pissing contest with a skunk.