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Why God Will Never Get Tenure at Any University


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1. Only published one book.

2. It was in Hebrew.

3. It had no references.

4. He did not publish it in referenced journals.

5. Some doubt He even wrote it Himself.

6. He is not known for His cooperative work.

7. Sure, He created the world, but what has He done lately?

8. He did not get permission from any review board to work with human subjects.

9. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by drowning all the subjects.

10. When sample subjects do not behave as predicted, He deletes the whole sample.

11. He rarely comes to class&md;just tells His students to read the Book.

12. It is rumored that He sometimes lets His Son teach the class.

13. Although He only has 10 requirements, His students often fail His tests.

14. He expelled His first two students for learning.

15. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.