Prospective Father-In-Law

Prospective father-in-law to daughter's suitor: "How much money do you have in the bank?"

Young man: "I don't know. I haven't shaken it lately."

An employee asked for a raise, telling his boss that several companies were after him. When asked which ones, he told his employer, "There's the electric company, the phone company and the gas company."

It costs more to buy the average new car in the U. S. today than it cost Christopher Columbus to equip and undertake his maiden voyage to the New World.