Grade School Essays

The beguiling ideas about science quoted here were gleaned from fifth and sixth graders' essays, exams and classroom discussions: "You can listen to thunder after lightning and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it you got hit, so never mind." "When planets go around and around in circles we say they are orbiting. When people do it we say they are crazy." "A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way to go." "Genetics explain why you look like your father and if you don't why you should." "Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they're here." "We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for many things people forget to put the top on." "I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it and that is the important thing." "Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound." "Question: In what ways are we dependent upon the sun? Answer: We can always depend on the sun for sunburns and tidal waves."