Pastoral burnout, moral failure, and resignations are at an all-time high. A major factor is overwhelming ministry stress and a lack of work-life balance. According to Soul Shepherding:
- 75% of pastors report being “extremely stressed” or “highly stressed.”
- 90% work between 55 to 75 hours per week.
- 90% feel fatigued and worn out every week.
- 70% say they’re grossly underpaid.
- 80% will not be in ministry ten years later, and only a fraction will make it a lifelong career. On average, seminary-trained pastors last only five years in church ministry.
It’s particularly disturbing to see how much pastors are struggling with emotional pain, family problems, loving well, and moral failures. Let’s break it down:
Conflict Issues
- 40% report a serious conflict with a parishioner at least once a month
- 78% were forced to resign from their church (63% at least twice), most commonly because of church conflict
- 100% of 1,050 Reformed and Evangelical pastors had a colleague who had left the ministry because of burnout, church conflict, or moral failure
Emotional Pain & Burnout
- 91% have experienced some form of burnout in ministry.
- 18% say they are “fried to a crisp right now.”
- 70% of pastors say they have lower self-esteem now than when they entered ministry.
- 70% constantly fight depression.
- 50% feel so discouraged that they would leave their ministry if they could but can’t find another job.
Marriage & Family Conflict
- 80% believe their pastoral ministry has negatively affected their families.
- 33% said it was an outright hazard.
- 80% of ministry spouses feel left out and unappreciated in their church.
- 77% feel they do not have a good marriage.
- 41% display anger problems in marriage (reported by the spouse).
- 38% are divorced or divorcing.
- 50% admit to using pornography.
- 37% report inappropriate sexual behavior with someone in the church.
- 65% feel their family is in a glass house.
Why aren’t these pastors overflowing with the Lord’s love, joy, and peace in their lives, families, and ministries? What are the causes of their emotional problems and moral failures?
Is Pastoral Burnout an Epidemic?
These stats paint a picture of an epidemic among pastors right now. Is pastoral ministry just that tough? Is it possible for a pastor to enjoy their pastorate? The answer is yes. There are a lot of factors that play into these stats, though. The type of church, board structure, pastor’s gifts/strengths, and match of pastor to church can play a part. The pastor’s personal mental health, past trauma, and ability to handle stress are also factors to consider.
Congregations will never understand their pastor’s weight of responsibility. A pastor has to take personal responsibility for their soul. So, the pastors must set up a soul-care system for themselves. A pastor must protect themselves and their hearts. They can do this by creating a work-life balance. With ministry, a leader gives all they have, yet there will always be more to do.
Here are 12 ways to create a work-life balance:
How to Create a Healthy Work-Life Balance for Pastors
1. Communicate the Plan to the Church
The pastor should communicate clearly to the congregation what a healthy pastor looks like and how they plan to pursue that goal. The greatest gift a pastor can give their church is being healthy. The pastor has to communicate lovingly that their priority is their spiritual walk, emotional health, physical health, marriage, and family. Do this in love, not bitterness or anger.
2. Practice Sabbath
Sabbath is a lost, sacred practice. God created the Sabbath for mankind. It’s a day to rest, pursue recreation, spend time with the Lord, and unplug. It has been said this way: “If you don’t work, then God says you are lazy. However, if you don’t rest, you are considered disobedient.” Rest from our work shows we trust God instead of our productivity. Sabbath helps pastors to rejuvenate. Every pastor needs to unplug intentionally. The pastor will choose to “come apart a while and rest,” or they will just “come apart.”
3. Set Clear Boundaries
The pastor should never complain about what they permit. The church has to know the boundaries. With technology, there are many ways to accomplish this, such as Google phone numbers, setting the phone do not disturb, and an email signature with times they can respond. The congregants who get mad at boundaries are those who don’t have respect for those who set the boundaries.
4. See a Counselor
Counselors aren’t just for those who are in trouble. Counselors can help pastors vent their anger, see perspective, and get solutions. As a pastor, I have had counseling before and am very open to my congregation about this. Many of them have started seeing a counselor. The pastor is often the general counselor through sermons but also counsels others personally. The counselor needs a counselor to stay healthy and maintain a work-life balance.
5. Make a Priority Covenant
The pastor should make a priority covenant for their family and church. They simply make a “10 Commandments/Promises” to give the church and family. This holds them accountable and gives them a target to shoot for in work-life balance.”
6. Give Staff Free Time Off after Big Event Days
This is for the pastor and staff. For instance, the pastor should take the week off after Easter and give staff time. Some churches do this after Christmas and Easter each year. After high days of engaging ministry, the pastor should have “low days” of rest.
7. Have a Hobby
Every pastor needs a hobby they do for fun only for them. Mountain biking, golf, strength training, fishing, art, cooking, traveling, or music can be some fun activities to help the pastor disengage from thinking about ministry. Their children or family may have separate hobbies, but the pastor needs one just for themselves.
8. Get Regular Feedback from Your Spouse
A pastor’s spouse will honestly share how they feel about life and ministry. The pastor should be checking in regularly with their spouse. They are often so driven that they can’t see the toll the pace of ministry is taking on their family or themselves until it’s too late.
9. Be Intentional with Emotional Health
It is important that a pastor listens to podcasts, reads books, and talks to others about their emotional health. Ministry can be a dopamine rush by going from one engagement to the next with the motivation of growth or progress. It’s easy not to pay attention to the soul as pastors care for other people’s souls. One day a week to focus on emotional health will keep the leader aligned.
10. Take the Full Vacation (Uninterrupted)
Brady Boyd, the pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs, CO, said to a group of pastors in 2021, “It is for the sake of my responsibilities that I rest. I’m not forsaking my responsibilities when I rest.” A good rule of thumb is to have only one person from the church who can contact the pastor when on vacation. Everything can filter through that person. In a perfect world, to have that work-life balance, the pastor needs the whole vacation uninterrupted with backup plans for the church in the case of a death or hospital visit.
11. Make a System for On-Call Needs
There should be a system for how much on-call the pastor or staff has to engage in when dealing with care ministry. Again, communication is the key to making this happen. Pastors must work with their leaders and then filter the information to the congregation on how this will take place. The “why” is also very important too. If the leaders and congregation know that it’s so the pastor will be healthy and have a better tenure with the church, they may be more open to this.
12. Negotiate Extra Time Off with Tenure
The pastor should negotiate more time off the longer they are at a church. This can be a paid sabbatical every 5th year or even an extra week of vacation every 3-5 years. Pastors don’t unusually stay long-term, so this can be an incentive and a built-in guardrail to stay healthier the longer they are there.
Do Not Become Another Statistic
Burnout and exhaustion don’t have to be your story. If you’re struggling, try one or some of these 12 ways to create a work-life balance and see how it shifts the trajectory of your life. You can lead and serve your church well while leading and serving yourself well. I pray you find this balance in your life so you do not become another negative statistic. You are called for such a time as this!
Frequently Asked Questions
Here are some common questions pastors might ask:
1. How can pastors effectively delegate tasks to prevent burnout?
Delegation is crucial for pastors to manage their workload and prevent burnout. By entrusting responsibilities to capable staff or volunteers, pastors can focus on their core duties and maintain a healthier work-life balance.
2. How can pastors use technology to streamline their work and free up personal time?
Utilizing tools like scheduling apps, email filters, and virtual meeting platforms can help pastors manage their responsibilities more efficiently, leaving more time for rest and family.
3. How can pastors manage unexpected emergencies while maintaining a balanced schedule?
Pastors often face unexpected emergencies that can disrupt their schedules. Learning to prioritize and delegate urgent tasks can help them address these situations without compromising their personal time.
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